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Letter from a Young Arab American

Posted on Wednesday September 25, 2002

From Ream Jazzar
Sept. 25, 2002

Dear Mr. Zogby,

Hello. First off I would just like to thank you for your show. It’s something we’ve really been needing, especially after 9/11. Though I could just keep going on about how wonderful your show is, I’m going to get to my point.

I’m a seventeen year old Arab American living most of the year in Saudi Arabia, and every summer in Arizona. My family comes to Arizona to visit my mother’s family. Like all teens my age, life can be complicated. However, I feel the complications were worsened after 9/11. Because I am living in two places where slowly hostilities are growing, I can’t help but feel it. It’s sad really, no matter where I am there are fears. You think you’re getting away, but unfortunately they follow. I am like millions out there feeling torn. It is sad to see such a tragedy, then be blamed for it. I was never a victim of racism or prejudice, and neither was my family, but there is always that lingering fear of maybe someday.

Sometimes I look at my little brother and thank God he doesn’t understand about always fearing one of your parents will be held in some airport, or having to lower your voice when you speak Arabic. A month after 9/11, the FBI was at our door. Fortunately, we were already in Saudi Arabia. But they left their card with our neighbors because they “just wanted to talk.”

When I hear stories of American women married to Arabs, or Saudis in particular, living in fear due to abuse from the husband and/or his family, my reaction is very different from how networks are expecting Americans to react. Which is shock, maybe disgust and the escalation of hate, distrust and fear, as if there is not enough of that. First of all, I know Saudi men may abuse their wives or maybe even their sisters, but so can any other man in this vast universe. This is of course going against Islamic laws, but why the focus on this when a Muslim commits the violation? In the US men murder their wives and get away with it, calling it mental problems or obsession. However, Islam is unfairly brought in the spotlight when Saudis are in question.

My mother, an American, leads an active and productive life back in Saudi Arabia. Though she can’t drive, it does not stop her from going out with friends, volunteering, shopping, visiting family, and dropping and picking up my little brother from kindergarten. She is very accepted in my large loving Saudi family. Coming from a large and loving family herself, it was hard for her to move so far away after she married. Moving to Saudi Arabia, at the young age of 21, I feel is very brave. Eighteen years ago, I don’t believe she knew what was ahead of her. Gaining a new family, having five children, and learning and educating others of this new culture that her decision brought to her, are what she can now boast about.

Along the years, she made friends with American and Arab women there. Some Americans are married to Saudis or Arabs and some to Americans. Many of my father’s friends are also married to American women who my mother became close to. But most of her acquaintances are part of a group called American Ladies of Jeddah (ALJ), which she is a part of. Some of these women are very active and outspoken in society. Many of these women I believe would be perfect examples of the lives of American women in Saudi Arabia. I know of many women, American or Arab American women, who I would be proud to have represent Americans in Saudi Arabia. I would be happy to suggest some women or even tell you more about what I feel for your show if you’re interested.

I wrote to you specially, because I know how you are always on the side of the truth and not afraid to speak it, no matter what the issue.

Thank You,
Ream Jazzar